Spoons of Fury
by Hayakaze
Summary: [LxLight][weird yaoi] Silly little fic I wrote in which Light gets assaulted repeatedly by some spoons. May become a chaptered story, depending on response...


**Spoons of Fury**

**WARNING**: This story contains weird yaoi. If this doesn't interest you, don't read!

Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own Death Note.

Pairing: LLight

Rated: M for language.

A/N: This is actually _mostly_ my first attempt at DN fanfic, but I had to finish it off and add plot-bits so I'm not just shoving them against each other for no apparent reason... n.n;

Sorry about being a day late and all that, but I'm kind of afraid to post, because I haven't gotten a very supportive response. Be the one to review and help me know that someone's actually enjoying these! (review the other one too!)

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**---Spoon---**

Light woke up. Something heavy was on him... again.

"Ryuuzaki! Wake up, dammit!"

The ringed eyelids parted and the never-blinking eyes stared at Light. "Sorry, Raito-kun." L removed himself from Light's chest.

The first few times it had happened, Light wished he could escape to a different room, and just get away from the offender so he could calm down. But the goddamn chain prevented it. And L never seemed affected by it, which made Light even angrier.

L rose and sauntered toward the door. Light followed sourly. He didn't want to go, ever, but he knew L would just drag him out or stare at him creepily if he didn't follow.

L made tea as soon as possible every morning, and usually without sleeping beforehand. Those days, the insomniac would drag Light out of bed hours early. Light found that the detective actually slept a lot, when he _did_ sleep.

Light decided to have cereal. As he reached up to get the box from the cupboard, he jerked the chain that linked him to the infuriating detective. L's spoon flew out of his hand and hit Light in the head.

"Ow, shit!" Light exclaimed instinctively. He glared over at L, expecting an unexpressive "Sorry," or something else... But L was simply staring. "What the hell?" Light shot.

L showed no change in emotion. "I'd like my spoon back, if you don't mind too much," he said blandly.

Light blinked. _He_'d been the one to... well, okay, it was sort of his fault... but there was no way he would admit it.

He picked it up and gave it to L, who threw it back at his head. He barely ducked, and the spoon grazed his ear.

"Why the hell do you _throw it at me_?"

"Dunno."

"You- yes you do!"

L didn't say anything. He just stared vapidly.

"Ryuuzaki! Why are you throwing it at me!"

"You don't have to be angry."

"I don't have to be angry?" Light seethed before exploding. "You don't know why I'm angry. It's because of this damn chain! I'm not Kira, the killings have continued and I haven't done anything! You keep a camera in our room and record while you're sleeping, so I'm completely cleared! And yet the chain remains. So every morning I have to push you off me, which is awkward, and then you drag me out of bed and in here when I don't want to, and-"

He stopped when L stepped forward and put his nose four inches from Light's. "What would you rather do, Raito-kun?" He cocked his head to the side for added effect.

Light simply retracted his head, closed his eyes and grinned. He said pointedly, "It's things like _this_, Ryuuzaki. They're-"

Something was wrong. L was much too close, and Light's lips were now touching something else, and Light realized that L was kissing him.

The moment Light registered what was happening, it was over.

As L pulled away, he wore a very small, almost unnoticable smug grin that Light may or may not have noticed, had he been further away. After a moment, L turned away quickly and pulled a new spoon out of the drawer. Then he calmly went back to stirring his tea and infesting it with dubious amounts of sugar.

As if nothing had just happened.

"What the _hell_, Ryuuzaki..."

"What?" L said innocently.

Light yanked the chain in ire and the spoon hit him again. "God DAMNIT Ryuuzaki! Stop fucking throwing the spoon at me!"

"I'm not throwing it, Raito-kun. You're doing it." L stated nonchalantly, still giving Light an innocent look.

Light really tried hard to not punch the sullen boy. He really did. But everything was overwhelming him, and he slowly drew back his fist.

"Raito-kun." L whispered it softly. "Are you letting your emotions take over again? I really hate to see you when you're not thinking straight."

Light stopped, horrified. "Thinking... straight...? Ryuuzaki, with all the random things that have happened in the past ten minutes, there's no _way_ I could think straight."

"But, I can."

"Yes, you can, because _this is normal for you!_ Now, most people don't get dragged places against their will, repeatedly attacked by spoons, hit on and _kissed_ by a member of the same gender all in ten minutes!" He took a calming breath and then continued. "Kami, Ryuuzaki, will you _ever_ learn how to be normal?"

L stared at him, unblinking.

It soon became apparent that he wasn't going to reply.

Light normally would have left the room. But again, this problem was attached to him indefinitely, and he had no choice but to solve it. Staying angry and not thinking clearly would probably lead to a Freudian slip, so, naturally, the problem must be solved.

Easier said than done.

But he gave it a shot and tried to think of something else, something that he was genuinely interested in and would take his mind off the abnormal events that had just taken place.

Unfortunately, the only things he was interested in were how to evade arrest and getting L's real name.

That wasn't exactly going to work as a distraction.

He glanced over at L, who was busy stirring his tea...

* * *

L had just stared at Light after being accused harshly. Normal? No. That wasn't normal for L. 

But then, Light had noted that L was, in fact, abnormal. So it could very well _be_ normal for him, and he just didn't know it yet. Perhaps it was? That would make sense. He'd never exactly been in any of those situations before now, so he couldn't really know.

Dragging people against their will, not literally. It wasn't like he chained himself to people on a regular basis. In fact, that idea had been a spur-of-the-moment kind of thing. Nevertheless, it wasn't normal of him...

Attacking people with spoons, yes, that was new, but only because Light did it to himself the first time. The second time... L had no excuse. He'd thrown it. But he had made sure it would miss. And the third, well, that really hadn't been L's fault either. Though, he may have aimed that time...

...and _that_... that was most definitely not like himself...

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A/N: So I really don't like writing chapters but I can only either end it there or continue for 18 chapters. :( But you know how things end up, you've read enough fanfic, be creative! 

Well, review. CONCRIT requested as usual. I write more when I know people want it.


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